ammogirl

While I love the (overpriced) bras and panties from Victoria’s Secret, every time I get a catalog from them in the mail, I always wonder: does anyone actually wear the CLOTHES they try to sell in there? Maybe I’m just totally out of it, fashion-wise. Also, when I look through the swimwear catalog, all I can think is how I’m never going to look as fabulous as the models. I think I’ll stick to my furtive, hasty trips to Target where I grab two or three suits I like and take them home to wash in hopes that at least one will fit.

Anyway, the girls made it home today, and I could tell immediately who Lindsey spent the most time with, as she was talking JUST LIKE her Aunt Christy. A little hero worship going on there, I think. When we got home I checked in with work, found out they weren’t expecting me in today, and proceeded to…kick both their asses on ROCK BAND!!! By the way, from here on out, every reference to ROCK BAND!!! will be made in exactly that way, with the all caps and three exclamation points. I think it’s only fair to pay the proper respect.

The girls smirked and joked and poked fun at me the entire way home, doubting my skills, and even went so far as to say, “Uh-huh, TRAINING mode, surrreee you can’t log in to XBox Live” when I told them about that. I turned around and they were both silently laughing and I said, “Mmhmm, we’ll see.”

I fired it up and although I found myself fairly nervous at playing in front of people, I managed to get it together in the end for a fairly good showing. The girls were silent, and, I could tell, intrigued. “Here”, I said, “have a go.”

After restarting several, SEVERAL times each, it didn’t take long for them to realize the fabulousness that is me playing ROCK BAND!!! And they were properly chagrined. Seriously, I could be Tommy Lee. Or…hmm. That’s the only drummer I know. Well, besides Dave Grohl, who, fun fact for anyone who doesn’t know, was the drummer for Nirvana. Did anyone not know that? We played for awhile, taking turns between every song, and then Taylor’s friend came over in the middle of stupid “Green Grass and High Tides” or “The Longest Song in the Universe” or whatever the fuckity fuck it is. I was…kind of embarrassed. There was like three piles of laundry on the floor, and suitcases laying everywhere, and me…not doing anything about it.

It’s really, really good having them back. I know I bitch about the teen angst a lot, but I miss them when they’re gone. We have fun.

Tschuss!!

So the girls were scheduled to fly home on American today.  When everything started getting canceled, they were moved to a United/Lufthansa combo, but when they showed up at the airport in Sacramento yesterday, they were totally thwarted and United wouldn’t take them, so American rescheduled them AGAIN, and now they aren’t coming home until Monday.  Lindsey sent me an IM around 6pm all MOM.  OMG we couldn’t come home SRSLY and I said, oh, bet you’re upset about that one, aren’t you and she immediately shot back something like HA HA HA.  Really though, total score all around: two extra days of no cooking for me, two extra days of vacation for them PLUS no school on Monday.

I spent today doing house stuff, like trying to find some way to get rid of the crap ass fungus gnats that have infested all my repotted plants.  Ugh.  They aren’t like…fruit fly levels of gross or anything (fruit flies are inconceivably disgusting to me.  Seeing them makes me feel nauseus, I AM WEIRD) but they ARE very annoying.  I finally put out little bowls of an old bottle of red wine I had because they are like, suicidal and will dive into any standing liquid, and I figured death by wine is a good way to go.  I’m pest-friendly.

Speaking of bugs, for SOME UNKNOWN REASON last night I Googled  ‘biggest bugs‘  and then ‘Goliath spiders‘ and wtf, me, WHAT WAS I THINKING?  Can you imagine looking down and seeing a spider with a leg span of 12 inches?

Anyway.  I was at the BX today looking at greeting cards, when the cashier at the jewelry counter TOTALLY hit on the friend of the customer she was helping.  I didn’t hear what she opened with but this was the the conversation that followed:

guy: “Wha…no, I’m married.”

cashier girl: “What?”

guy: “I’m married.”

cashier girl: “ohhh…what a waste.”

guy: “Umm…”

cashier girl:  “seriously, that’s a real waste.”

guy: “…”

I was like, !!! and full-on turned around for the stare because holy fuck, BRAZEN!  It was great.

I think it’s time for some drumming.

Tschuss!!

Apparently, when you are taking Zoloft because you are slightly south of stable, you should not do these things in this order:  1.  drink a glass of wine 2.  watch Idol Gives Back (especially the part with Annie Lennox) 3.  call your seester after watching the segment with the Manning brothers and thinking that people with siblings (like me) are the luckiest.  Why, you ask?  Just…because.  Also, yeah.  For the past four months, Sia’s Breathe Me?  Has been my kryptonite.  When I’m having a particularly bad day I generally have that song on repeat, because it pretty much sums up…everything.  Hearing it’s opening notes during Forest Whitaker’s segment was just about too much.  I had to pause and feel really sorry for myself for a little bit, which in turn made me feel even worse, because HI, DYING BABIES ON THE TV.  And poor people with no teeth and totally horrendous living conditions in our own country.  What in the world do I honestly have to complain about?  Towels on the floor?  Stupid.

Anyway, American Idol Gives Back, way to make it impossible for military personnel stationed overseas to donate money!  I can’t call, and when I went to the website touted so frequently during the broadcast, guess what? NO APO SELECTION AVAILABLE.  World!  APO AA/AE/AP!  Open these choices up for shipping/billing/DONATING purposes!  God!

I’m okay right now, actually, although it might not seem like it.  I just wish I could go home.

Tschuss!!