ammogirl

I was getting a little worried for a moment, because John is coming home very soon (earlier than Saturday, later than Thursday, but I can’t say exactly what day because of the military and it’s OPSEC rules) and as of Sunday, I had not had, you know, my monthlies.  This would have been a ginormous problem for my husband, who over the last five months away has descended increasingly back into 15 year old boy who just discovered sex.  Boys probably discover sex a lot younger than that, don’t they?  I’m assuming yes, but I am sticking with 15 for my example.  However, tragedy was averted, and I can tell you with 100 % certainty that I will be doing it on Friday.  And now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, I will never bring it up again, and I am still wondering exactly why I told you any of that.

Oh well.

We didn’t have to work on Monday, since it was the first day of Summer here.  I woke up feeling like crap, with a stuffy nose and a gimpier than normal back, and after I blew my nose for several minutes, I hobbled my way down the stairs where I lay on the couch nursing three cups of coffee until I felt alive enough to start cleaning the house.  It took me all day, because I would get bored after doing, say, all the bathroom sinks, and take a break.  Cleaning a house in this way is not very practical, and involves climbing up and down stairs way more times than I would like, so I wouldn’t recommend it.  Also not recommended?  Eating 3/4 of a box of ginger snaps like I did during my cleaning breaks.  Sort of hurts your stomach, that.

Anyway, I bought I whole bunch of books for my Kindle, and I got really frustrated with one of them.  Have you heard of the “You” series by Dr. Mehmet Oz?  He (and somebody else, I forget who) does a Diet You, and a You Manual, and…several others.  I got the “Stop Aging You”, which is not the real title, but you get the gist.  I was pretty excited, because these books got tons of good reviews on Amazon, and I thought I’d get some great information, like, butter is good for you, eat lots of red meat etc.  Instead, I trudged through chapter after chapter of the same thing said in different ways:  ‘Our book will tell you how to stop aging!  All you have to do is read our book!”  Seriously, a million different chapters of that, with a whole lot more words.  Every chapter, I’d come to the end, and think, ‘Finally!  I will turn the page and be amazed with the secret to eternal life!’ and then I’d turn the page, and it would read, “Hey there!  Thanks for buying this book, which will teach you all the secrets to staying young.  Secret number one?  Read this book!”  Eventually I got bored with it and went back to the novel I was reading, but I was so bugged I just went to bed, feeling at least two years older.

What I want to know is, are all self-help books like that?  A whole lot of crap and no actual substance?  Because the way I look at it, I write like that every time I post.  And I don’t think I’m helping anyone.  Or getting paid.  Or invited to various talk shows.  I think I need to find a better agent.

Tschuss!!