ammogirl

Oh my god, and it’s NOT EVEN GOOD!  It’s just honey-sweetened sugar, but I still just ate so many handfuls that my TONGUE IS BURNING and I am having COLD SWEATS.  That cannot be good!  Seriously!

Well.  Yesterday was my cardio stress test.  It went like this:  IV, wait.  Receive first dose of radioactive tracer, wait 60 minutes while drinking one liter of water.  Take images of heart.  Wait.  Get hooked up to EKG monitors, which entailed the application of SANDPAPER to my skin in nine different spots, including my BOOBS, followed up with an alcohol wipe, TOTALLY OW.  Also, the young man who applied these electrodes was 20 years old.  And I was standing there in only a sport bra and he was manipulating my boobs.  It was awkward.  Anyway.  EKG monitors, wait.  Take EKG readings whilst I am supine, and standing up.  Wait for cardiologist to arrive to perform the exercise portion of my test.  Walk on a treadmill for 13 minutes and 51 seconds, at speeds ranging from 1.5 – 5.0 mph and inclines from 1-18%.  Die, sort of (but figuratively, as in god damn 18% incline is really fucking steep).  Reach my target heart rate.  Receive second dose of radioactive tracer.  Complete final minute on treadmill, still at 18%.  Wonder what sort of ill effects transpire when being dosed with radioactive tracer (not many-it’s like getting an x-ray, but from the inside [or so Wikipedia says]).  Get disconnected from the EKG wires.  Receive instructions to purchase and consume one pint of whole milk and one chocolate bar.  Am inwardly and outwardly excited about instructions because: yum.  Also:  Hi, Dr. Cardiologist, whole milk and a chocolate bar?  YOU ARE THE BEST CARDIOLOGIST EVER.  Wait 60 minutes.  Take second set of heart images.  Wait.  Get clean bill of health.  Leave.

It wasn’t bad at all, actually, but it did take for-ev-er.  I was there from 615am – 1145am, but the majority of the time I was just waiting for the next thing to happen, or peeing, due to the one liter of water.  I also spent an inordinate amount of time changing in and out of my sports bra, which was sort of painful, what with the IV needle in my arm.  I couldn’t wear my bra for either sets of images, but of course the cardio portion required sports bra-age, so it was on-off, on-off, on.  Actually, that last on didn’t really happen, because I was going home at that point to shower.  Besides, who needs bras!  I say burn them!

While getting prepped for the second set of images, the tech implored me to stay awake, because this time through the EKG was hooked up for later merging with the images, and any large change in heart rate would cause the imaging to not take.  And look, I tried really, REALLLLLY hard to stay awake, but during the test you lie on a bed with your head and knees propped with cushions, a blanket covering you, and the lights off.  It’s warm in the room, and you can hear both the humming of the machine and your own heartbeat.  On top of that, don’t forget the pint of whole milk/chocolate bar consumption, anddddd…the next thing I knew, the imaging was done!  I heard the tech moving around so I timidly offered, “Um?  I think I might have fallen asleep?”  He confirmed this, but fortunately the difference between my regular heart rate and my sleeping heart rate must not be that different because there were no anomolies of any sort.

Anyway, that was my day.  In other news, I have a new job.  Well-not a new JOB, per se, but just new…no, it’s a new job.  Same office, completely different (read: more awesome) duties.  I don’t actually make the move to my new desk until 10 November, but I’ve been doing new job stuff exclusively all week long, and my initial thought are OH MY GOD I LOVE MY NEW JOB.  It’s so much better suited to me, in that I am not ever going to be a person who can be handed a vague concept with flimsy detail which depend on everything and everybody else and come up with an end state.  Because of the “ooh, shinyyyy!” factor, yeah?  In other words, I can’t concentrate on one thing long enough for stuff like that.  But when I am handed a task, with actual, measureable data and a pre-defined conclusion?  ALL OVER IT.  Orrr…a better example would be, say, parties.  I won’t ever volunteer to run the decoration committee, but if you give me the decorations and tell me your idea of what you want the room to look like in the end, I will impress you with my mad skilz.  I’m easily distracted.  I can’t help it.

Finally, NaBloPoMo starts in two days (or three, depending on how you count), and I am gonna need some help.  30 days straight of posting is going to be tough, and unless you want 30 entries of “hi, today I went to work, bye”, then I beg you.  Send me ideas.  Ask me questions.  Give me memes. Anything.  Anything at all.  

Alright, off to tennis.  Oh, also.  In case you were wondering, the next four papers for my classes are due this coming Monday, and no, I have not started them.  I need tough love.

Tschuss!!

Last night was the Rocky Horror Picture Show.  And now I can cross “seeing the Rocky Horror Picture Show live” off my list of things to do before I die.  Probablyyyyyyy won’t go again.  I mean, it was fun, for sure.  Who doesn’t love throwing things at people you don’t know?  But MY GOD IT STARTS SO LATE.  I know there are tons of you out there who don’t start your night until 10pm or so but hi, I am not one of you.  Last Friday, if you will recall, I was in bed by 930pm.  930pm last night, however, found me drinking Electric Lemonade at Chili’s, lamenting the fact that I was nowhere close to being able to go to sleep.  

On a rethink…hm.  It’s quite possible that we had such a good time last night because of the Electric Lemonade. And the raspberry Kamikazes.  And the…omg…I HAD A WINE COOLER!  Yes!  Because the only drinks being served at the show were Bud Light and wine coolers.  I had blue flavor.  It tasted exactly like suntan lotion.  And that’s why I don’t drink wine coolers.  

Also in the mix were tequila shots, but this girl does not do tequila.  I got one whiff from a glass and my stomach did a quick flip.  Instead, I sent the shot protaganist to the bar for more water, poured my two shots in his bottle of Corona, and filled the glasses back up with water.  Upon his return from the bar, I made a big to-do about not drinking tequila, finally relenting in a very dramatic fashion.  After the toast, I salted, shot, and limed just like normal, and nobody was the wiser.  

When our co-worker appeared on the stage, it was a leeeetle awkward, what with the gold speedo.  Oh, and then later when he put on the fishnet stockings, corset and heels for the cabaret number?  Also odd.  They did really well, though, and like I said, we had a good time.  

When I got home at TWO-FIFTEEN A.M. and undressed for bed, a shower of rice hit the floor when I took off my bra.  I think that’s the sign of a good night.

Tschuss!!

Oh my god.  Bobby sent me a link to DustFilm’s literal music videos on Funny or Die where they parody 80′s songs by singing exactly what’s happening in the video.  They lose a lot in my description but you HAVE to go watch them.  They’re fabulous.

Okay, I am having a forum discussion in one of my classes, in which one person got on a random tangent and stated:

…if you participate in unhealthy habits, you will inherit an unhealthy illness.  It is unfortunate that these unhealthy habits are transmitted through genetics, causing siblings and thier offspring to be at risk.

I was like…wha?  So of COURSE, I responded:

Unhealthy habits aren’t transmitted through genetics, but through modeling.  Nobody is genetically predisposed to become a smoker just because their parents smoked.

Then, someone else chimed in with a response back to MY response:

Would you say the same thing if the mother smoked during childbirth?  What about alcohol?

Okay, disregarding the obvious, which is that I really, really hope a mother wouldn’t be smoking…DURING ACTUAL CHILDBIRTH, still not the point.  Now, I am no expert in genetics or birth defects or anything like that, and I do realize smoking and drinking during pregnancy is bad, and causes problems.  But unhealthy habits?  NOT TRANSMITTED THROUGH GENETICS.  I responded back:

That is a really, really good question.  After doing some research, I am going to go with my original response, which was that unhealthy habits, to include smoking and drinking during pregnancy, do not pass through genetics to an unborn child.

A caveat:  I DO NOT support nor condone smoking and drinking during pregnancy.

However, the genetic makeup of a person is determined at the point of conception.  While I will completely agree that a mother’s poor habits during pregnancy can and often do affect her unborn child, I do not think that unhealthy habits are genetic.  Birth defects related to smoking and drinking during pregnancy are the result of environmental factors, not the genetic factors of the parents.

I hope I’ve been able to explain that while I do agree a parent’s unhealthy habits affect their children, many times negatively; and that unhealthy behavior does tend to repeat itself among families (alcoholism, abuse, etc.), I believe those factors are learned, not genetic.

Do you understand what I’m saying?  I mean, I’m opinionated and stubborn, but not because I’m predisposed genetically to be.  I’m that way because my parents raised me to believe I am awesome and should get what I want.  And! If you look at the flip side, if parents are vegetarians, never smoke or drink, and exercise a lot, their children are not automatically going to become non-smokers or non-drinkers or vegetarians.  

I do understand what the original poster was trying to say, which I think was that unhealthy habits are passed on to children.  That’s true.  But he lost me at genetics.

Gotta run!

Tschuss!!